Welcome to Litsy!

While I am really enjoying this book I think it is at times guilty of over sensationalizing which the author dragged Oprah of doing the same thing.

The sex in TV and movies can be simultaneously explicit and evasive. Sex, particularly noncommitted sex, is typically presented as fun and advisable; rarely is it #awkward or silly or challenging or messy or actively negotiated or preceded by discussion of contraception and disease protection. There‘s always plenty of room in the backseat of those limousines, and nary a pothole in the road.

#QuotsyMar19 #31DaysOfNonFiction

#MusicalNewYear I liked this book because it acknowledges that not everybody is #waiting for marriage. I read this 2 years ago and it was interesting and thought provoking.

What a brutally honest and direct book. This was a really interesting and at times uncomfortable to read. I think the author balanced the interviews with her volunteers and her research well and made it engaging.

Why does the cover have to be so loud?? I‘m just trying to be a better mom to my daughters by reading this & boy, that subtitle is accurate

Wow! So much here to learn and discuss. I passed along to my 16 yo daughter to read next. Talking sex with kids can be difficult, but is so very important, as illustrated in this book. My biggest takeaway is that we need to be talking about the positives about sexual intimacy as well as all of those things we worry about. 👍🏼👍🏼

Peggy Orenstein talks about her groundbreaking book on my blog! Carolineleavittville.blogspot.com

Here's my lo-fi wrap up of February read. Several still in process (which I will be saying about Infinite Jest for several months) and I seem to have fallen off the HP chapter a day wagon. For a short month, I think this is respectable for me.

This is what happens when you go to the library to pick up one book on the reserve shelf. 😍😍😍😍😍📚📚📚📚📚📚

This book is outstanding--a pick plus. Sex has always been a minefield, particularly for girls and women. Orenstein narrows in on the current crop of high school and college young women and the particular challenges encountered by this generation. The bottom line is the need to talk more honestly and comprehensively to both girls AND boys about sex to achieve a more balanced, respectful interaction which is better for all.

#17booklove #pinkbooks

It took me forever to get through this because there were so many times I had to shake my head at Peggy Orenstein and walk away from the book. If you've done any reading on what it's like for girls to be sexual today, then you know most of what the book tells. I'm inclined to say this book is written for someone older than me who doesn't know all the complications that girls face. The only info that I found interesting was on the last page.

Nonfiction pick. I have a few issues with this one already but it's an interesting read.

They needed to be "smart, driven, involved in many different activities (as are men), and, in addition, they are supposed to be pretty, sexy, thin, nice, and friendly".

This book was great. Very thought provoking. Even though it made me uncomfortable, I appreciate the forward thinking she presents in the last quarter of the book. I wonder if I had kids, would I have the courage to talk to them so openly about body parts and sex and all the issues surrounding those topics. Not to instill fear and shame but to encourage dialogue, joy and exploration, respect for oneself and ones partner. Very awesome book.

The subject matter in this book is pretty heavy. A little depressing all the external factors girls face so early in their lives and how that influences their self thought and the choices they make.

Congrats to our runner-up in nonfiction: Peggy Orenstein's GIRLS & SEX!! Orenstein provides extremely important data about how girls (and boys) perceive sex in our culture. She discusses extensively the problems with porn culture, ignoring rape, and generally how society as a whole does (or does not) talk about sex. A great read for anyone who wants to better understand this important topic.
#readingwomenaward2016 #thereadingwomen

If you've ever encountered someone who didn't think rape was a thing or blamed a girl's outfit for how she was treated by boys, and you knew they were wrong but weren't quite sure how to respond, then you must read this book. Orenstein examines thoroughly examines how our culture's attitude towards sex, rape, and hookups and proposes a better way forward with education, acceptance, and mutual respect. Highly, highly recommend. #nonfictionnovember

Strange reading for a hospital waiting room? Lol. I finished my other book, and didn't think about whether it might look strange reading this in public when I packed my bag this morning. (Husband had surgery- he's in recovery and doing fine, whew!)

I've heard great things about this one. Now that it's available for $1.99 I guess It's time!

Current read

And my adult library haul. These were holds, picked up yesterday. Of course this morning I had an email to go pick up another hold... lol. 📚📚📚

"..the only thing that 100 percent of rapes have in common is a rapist. You can shroud women from head to toe, forbid them alcohol, imprison them in their homes- and there will still be rape."

Finished up this one last night. There was a lot of information, and I took it pretty slow. I definitely had more than one occasion in the last few weeks where what I read came up in conversation. I can't really decide if the world has changed that much since I was a teen, or if I was just totally oblivious to what was going on around me. Very interesting and sometimes disturbing read.

5🌟My how things have changed in the 15-20 years since I was in high school & college. Maybe my experience of pleasure and reciprocity was unique even then. Idk. I don't remember sexy dress being empowering, but rape and sexual assault weren't taken as seriously. 2 steps forward... It's up to us adults to help girls and boys get positive messages about sex & sexuality. Overall an important read for men and women, parents and non-parents. 👇🏻

Sorry I haven't been on much today. I'm trying to finish both of these books, and I cleaned out a fair number of childhood books today. Funny pictures forthcoming on Monday!

Meanwhile, both these books are breaking my heart for different reasons. 😭😭😭 But, they're both amazing.

The entirety of chapter 2 has made me so sad for the state of sexuality in girls and young women. (16-22) They don't consider their own pleasure as part of the experience and consider sex painful and gross. Receiving oral sex is apparently unsatisfying and gross as well. Yet they consider a man's pleasure their responsibility. Under 30% have had an orgasm with a partner. Just makes me so sad. ☹️😞 #litsyafterdark obvs.

🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🔥🔥🔥

http://www.thedp.com/article/2016/09/rape-culture-flyers

*when the content of your latest read seems to show up in the press directly after reading it.

Do you have girls/boys, teens, any young men/women you care about who are growing up in this day and age, or do you just care about how sex fits into the ongoing sexual dynamic of women & men. Where we've gone wrong (hint: little, none, or inaccurate sex ed) & where other countries have taken a different avenue with very interesting results. It's scary to read in our Puritanical society, but unless we start reading & talking, nothing will change.

flawed,” unable to “relax."
"Since all girls are now presumed to have oral sex in their repertoire,” she said, “anal sex is becoming the new ‘Will she do it or not?‘ behavior, the new ‘Prove you love me.‘"
"It‘s a metaphor, a symbol in one concrete behavior for the lack of education about sex, the normalization of female pain, and the way what had once been stigmatized has, over the course of a decade, become expected. If you don‘t want to do it..

Ok... I feel sadder just knowing this exists in the world and people are signing up to do it to themselves. 😢

* Again these are High School girls, so if they have a catchy slang saying ready at hand you know it's been passed around for a bit.

You know, because only intercourse will get you pregnant or create a risk of STD's (What?).
*
*Again High Schoolers here.

"Sam commented that while her male peers had been warned not to coerce girls into intercourse, pushing for oral was fair game."
*This is High School girls, just FYI...because that just makes it even more.....icky?

You know there is a problem when the "smart" girls feel unqualified because of beauty standards.

of winter. As concerned as I am about the policing of girls‘ sexuality through clothing, I also worry about the incessant drumbeat of self-objectification: the pressure on young women to reduce their worth to their bodies and to see those bodies as a collection of parts that exist for others‘ pleasure; to continuously monitor their appearance; to perform rather than to feel sensuality."
"... a conversation I had with Deborah Tolman, a professor...

That was true 'many' years ago when I was in high school too, but I was amazed at a lot of other things in this book that have changed, since my HS days, and not for the better.

That was true 'many' years ago when I was in high school too, but I was amazed at a lot of other things in this book that have changed, since my HS days, and not for the better.

thorny questions when looking at female sexuality at any age, but particularly when considering girls‘ early, formative experience. Nonetheless, I was determined to ask them."
^ Sounds like a promising start to this book.

Was this a perfect book? No. But this is a complicated subject where it's almost impossible to cover everything adequately, let alone in 236 pages. What that means is this book should be just the start of in depth scholarship. Regardless, as a primer this is a must read for anyone that has teens or college students in their lives.

I might need to try this one again as an audiobook. I really like listening to Orenstein in interviews, but I'm having a hard time getting into this one.

I wanted to like this book. I did learn from parts of it. But I feel it does a huge disservice to LGBT+ girls and their parents by only spending only one slight chapter on queer sexuality that focuses mostly on how the Internet is a safe haven.

There's a lot of important information about rape culture and how young girls are victims of constant sexualization from even the most benign sources.

But it was very white/hetero/cis centric.

Very heterocentric so far, which is to be expected. But I feel like a whole swath of ladies aren't being addressed...

I'm not quite certain, but I think my white feminist sense in tingling... 😬

I've only gone 2 deep into my 2016 Feminist Reading List, and I'm already exhausted...

It's one thing to know that there is pervasive misogyny in every corner of human culture... It's a totally new level when you're confronted with the research, studies, percentages, and figures...the body count, if you will.

My weekend reads...