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American Baby
American Baby: A Mother, a Child, and the Shadow History of Adoption | Gabrielle Glaser
8 posts | 7 read | 18 to read
The shocking truth about postwar adoption in America, told through the bittersweet story of one teenager, the son she was forced to relinquish, and their search to find each other During the Baby Boom in 1960s America, women were encouraged to stay home and raise large families, but sex and childbirth were taboo subjects. Premarital sex was common, but birth control was hard to get and abortion was illegal. In 1961, sixteen-year-old Margaret Erle fell in love and became pregnant. Her enraged family sent her to a maternity home, and after she gave birth, she wasn't even allowed her to hold her own son. Social workers threatened her with jail until she signed away her parental rights. Her son vanished, his whereabouts and new identity known only to an adoption agency that would never share the slightest detail about his fate. Claiming to be acting in the best interests of all, the adoption business was founded on secrecy and lies. American Baby lays out how a lucrative and exploitative industry removed children from their birth mothers and placed them with hopeful families, fabricating stories about infants' origins and destinations, then closing the door firmly between the parties forever. Adoption agencies and other organizations that purported to help pregnant women struck unethical deals with doctors and researchers for pseudoscientific "assessments," and shamed millions of young women into surrendering their children. Gabrielle Glaser dramatically demonstrates the power of the expectations and institutions that Margaret faced. Margaret went on to marry and raise a large family with David's father, but she never stopped longing for and worrying about her firstborn. She didn't know he spent the first years of his life living just a few blocks away from her; as he grew, he wondered about where he came from and why he was given up. Their tale--one they share with millions of Americans--is one of loss, love, and the search for identity. Adoption's closed records are being legally challenged in states nationwide. Open adoption is the rule today, but the identities of many who were adopted or who surrendered a child in the postwar decades are locked in sealed files. American Baby illuminates a dark time in our history and shows a path to reunion that can help heal the wounds inflicted by years of shame and secrecy.
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Cinfhen
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Pickpick

This was a re-read for upcoming IRL book club and it was just as impactful and infuriating as the first time I read it. What young unwed birth mothers went through emotionally and physically is beyond heartbreaking. And the social workers, doctors and other professionals behaviors and practices were criminal. For some adoption was the best choice, but for the young women who were forced & coerced into relinquishing both their rights & babies 💔

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jlhammar
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An unflinching look at the disturbing history of adoption in postwar America. Heartbreaking and infuriating.

#Angry #MayMoms
@Eggs @Alwaysbeenaloverofbooks

Alwaysbeenaloverofbooks 💔💔💔 2y
Eggs So tough to read about😭😭 2y
ChaoticMissAdventures I think this is a great time to read a lot about how bad the adoption world in this country can be, given the statements one SCOTUS judge has put into an up and coming decision. 2y
jlhammar @ChaoticMissAdventures Yes, good point. 2y
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Sophronisba
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When Margaret Erle was six years old, her favorite toys were dolls. She combed their hair and bathed them, kissed their hard plastic foreheads, and rocked them to sleep. #FridayReads #FirstLineFridays

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Cinfhen
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Pickpick

Parts of this book made me SO MAD, and other parts left me SO SAD. An eye opening book about the shady practices of closed adoptions, especially during the post WWII era, before the wide use of contraception and legalized abortions. My heart broke for the unwed young mothers forced by their parents to give up their parental rights and babies for adoption. The bullying & underhanded tactics were scandalous. Can‘t wait for bookclub discussion.

Chrissyreadit I have not read the book but closed adoption still occurred in the 80‘s! I knew of three girls who gave up babies in closed forced adoptions due to teen pregnancies. 3y
Crazeedi 💔 3y
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Megabooks I would love to discuss this with a book club! So glad you enjoyed it too. 3y
AmyG I have always wondered the circumstances of my adoption. It‘s really so heartbreaking. 3y
Chrissyreadit @AmyG will you ever be able to find out? ❤️ 3y
Cinfhen I feel for you @AmyG 💗according to this book if you were born in NYC & the 5 Burroughs during the 50‘s & 60‘s you can now obtain your birth records even if they were sealed. I‘m not sure if my husband even knows this ( the law was passed in 2019) although I‘m not sure he‘d want to know. For some/ most in the book it was a positive experience ( finding out the information) but I know that‘s not always the case. 3y
Cinfhen Very thought provoking read @Megabooks 3y
Cinfhen I think the book did mention each state was different starting in the late 70‘s @Chrissyreadit they began moving away from closed adoptions. It‘s so heartbreaking for those girls 😭 3y
Chrissyreadit @Cinfhen I think so too. One was a co worker of mine- when we were around 23- shared her experience of being sent to a home for unwed pregnant girls - we lived in Queens and I had no idea that could still happen. As an adult looking back- she had a horrible skin condition she developed- I wonder if it was related to the trauma of forced adoption. I‘m also surprised laws weren‘t changed sooner after Joel steinburg killed his adopted daughter lisa 3y
Cinfhen Oh wow!!! I totally remember that news story @Chrissyreadit that was so sad. He was super creepy that Joel Steinburg. 3y
AmyG @cinfhen I have no desire at this point to find any relatives...who knows if my birth parents are even alive? So many secrets when I was growing up...now, changes nothing if I even knew. @Chrissyreadit I remember watching and reading every minute of the Joel Steinberg trial. It was absolutely horrifying. 3y
Cinfhen I believe my husband feels the exact same way @AmyG sending love xx 3y
AmyG @cinfen Yeah, what‘s the point? The past can‘t be changed....the good and the bad. So....I will keep what I already have. I always joked...who needs more relatives, OY! Thanks, my friend . 😘 3y
Chrissyreadit @AmyG ❤️❤️❤️❤️ 3y
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Chelsea.Poole
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A #nonfiction #audiobook (with the physical book to follow along with) about adoption in America, with a specific family at the center of the narrative. Margaret Katz was a teenage mother in the early 1960s and forces (the time/her parents/religion/etc.) worked against her hopes of raising her own child. An examination of the treatment of children and families and how much things have changed with adoption. Heartbreaking but not without hope.

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Megabooks
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Some heartbreak and some hope, this is the story of closed adoptions in the 1960s, more specifically Jewish ones through the Louise Wise agency. The story gives this historical framework, but also focuses on Margaret Erle Katz and David Rosenberg. David was born to Margaret and her boyfriend (later husband) George. Margaret experienced many of the problems of the time, including not holding her son after birth, having their records sealed, & ⬇️

Megabooks ⬆️ being intimidated into signing him over through threat of juvenile hall. This is her life story of wondering and not knowing what happened to David until late in life, and David‘s story of a happy upbringing, yet that feeling of incompleteness. (edited) 3y
Megabooks @Cinfhen I think this is a must-read #audiobook for you. I think you‘ll love it! I may use it for #israel #readingasia2021 as part of the story takes place there. @BarbaraBB @Librarybelle 3y
AmyG I was adopted in 1958 in NJ. My mother always told me there were no records. Well, this looks fascinating now. 3y
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Megabooks @AmyG you may find this very interesting. The author (and I) also recommend this book. I read it when it came out a few years ago. Link to litsy review: Megabooks's post on Litsy https://litsy.com/p/UWhmSUZkeDRR (edited) 3y
AmyG Thank you! 3y
Cinfhen I‘m already convincing my IRL bookclub we NEED to read this!! My husband & his sister were both adopted through this agency!!! My SIL in 1961 and my husband 1966. THIS IS DEFINITELY A MUST READ for me!!!! Thanks so much for putting this book on my #ReadersRadar 💜 3y
alisiakae @AmyG @Megabooks Wow! I'm an adoptee from the closed adoption era (born 1979). Found my birth family in 2017 through DNA testing. Unfortunately, my birth mother passed away in 2009. We had both been looking for each other for years. That will always be a void, never meeting her. PA only granted adoptees access to our OBC in 2017. My gfather that passed away in Sept was my birth mother's dad, I'm grateful I got to know him for at least a few years. 3y
alisiakae @Cinfhen It's a must read for me too! Our rabbi is an adoptee as well, I'll have to tell him about this book! I helped him with DNA testing a few years ago. 3y
Cinfhen My husband NEVER talks about his adoption @4thhouseontheleft the kids got him one of those ancestry kits for Chanukah last year and he still hasn‘t used it. Where as my SIL found her birth parents several years ago, they ended up getting married 2 years after they put her up for adoption and they had a son. So she has a full blood brother. It‘s been rocky though with her birth family. And her birth parents divorced and both remarried. 3y
Megabooks @Cinfhen @4thhouseontheleft yes, I think you both would get a lot from reading this!!! Alisia, I‘m sorry you never had the chance to know your birth mother, but I‘m glad you got to know your grandfather before his passing. And Cindy, what a strange coincidence that it was your husband‘s family‘s adoptive agency, although I am not terribly surprised because it was the largest Jewish one on the East Coast. 3y
Cinfhen I think her experience wasn‘t very positive and it‘s tainted my husband‘s desire to seek information @4thhouseontheleft 3y
Cinfhen The kids & I watched the documentary Three Identical Strangers/ it was captivating and heartbreaking 3y
Megabooks @Cinfhen there was a lot of pseudoscience around adoption in the early 60s and babies were commonly passed from foster home to foster home for up to a year believing that was healthier. (The book discusses this.) Your husband may have unresolved, sort of inaccessible Trauma around that. Just a thought from what I learned in this book and what I‘ve previously learned about trauma therapy. 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ 3y
Megabooks @Cinfhen I have not watched that documentary but it discusses how twins and triplets were often split for “experimental reasons”. The work is so controversial it was sealed until 2065. 3y
Cinfhen My husband was adopted at birth/ he never went to any sort of foster system but he could have still experienced some sort of trauma. He does not believe in ANY THERAPY since as a child his parents (adoptive) made him see a therapist. He‘s a very “private” person when it comes to his background. 3y
alisiakae @Cinfhen It‘s definitely not always a positive experience. And I have definitely had some not great moments in reunion. That is part of the reason I waited as long as I did, the unknowns. 3y
AmyG I know!!! I saw your posts on here @4thhouseontheleft. @Cinfhen I‘m the same as your husband,adopted at 3 weeks. My kids wanted me to do a DNA test. I have no desire. For me....it changes nothing. I can‘t go back in time and I never look back. I have never wanted to find my birth family....ha, no more relatives please. I‘ve had enough. But i do find this fascinating and definitely want to read the books. It may clear up a few things for me. (edited) 3y
alisiakae @Megabooks Have you ever read this book? And @Cinfhen in adoption circles now, it is generally accepted that even when adopted at birth, a child experiences trauma. This book helped me put words to how I felt growing up. 3y
Librarybelle This sounds so moving and impactful. ❤️ 3y
alisiakae And eeek!! I just clicked on the Primal Wound book, and I‘m still the only one to review it on Litsy, and flashback to the first time I met my sisters! 😭🥰 3y
Cinfhen Yes; I absolutely understand how trauma is involved @4thhouseontheleft my husband has always said @AmyG that his parents were the ones who raised him day in, day out and he‘s never wanted to search out the people who created him. Everyone feels differently and I‘ve always respected his wishes. Truth is his (adoptive) parents could not have been more loving, kind, supportive and invested in him and his sister and our children. We were all blessed 3y
Catherine_Willoughby The laundry institutions in Ireland. Was still practice till the 1980s. In the news due to a report on the whole thing - still covering up !!!! My great Aunt husband discovered he was related to my aunt - cousin due cover up adoption in 1920s . No children. Our system is still bad! When religion is mixed in - just asking for more secrecy! 3y
Catherine_Willoughby @Cinfhen but in some cases it was against the parents wishes, forced upon them by their parents/community. They never forget the child they loss. Afraid of rejection from the child they think about every day if they seek them out . It only when they have another child do all the memories come back - seeing what they lost 3y
emilyhaldi Wow this is fascinating!!! @Cinfhen @4thhouseontheleft appreciate your personal insights. Is this book about the same adoption agency that was in the documentary Cindy mentioned?? I watched that recently and it was truly shocking. 3y
Cinfhen Oh, I agree @Catherine_Willoughby for many ,the young girls were forced to give up their babies and it‘s heartbreaking 💔I‘m just saying ,for my husband, he made peace with his birth parents putting him up for adoption whether by choice or not and he never wished to be reunited with them. 3y
Cinfhen It is @emilyhaldi 😩 3y
Kalalalatja The book sounds super fascinating, thanks for bringing it to my attention! And reading about @AmyG @Cinfhen @4thhouseontheleft personal experiences with adoption from that era, makes me want to read it even more, since I know next to nothing about something that must have impacted so many 💛 3y
AmyG @Kalalalatja I don‘t even know about it! This was the first I learned of it. Now I am fascinated. 3y
Reviewsbylola Omg literally just started this! 3y
Reviewsbylola @emilyhaldi I can loan you the audiobook when I‘m done. 3y
Megabooks @Reviewsbylola enjoy!! It was SO GOOD!! 3y
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blurb
nitalibrarian
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New year, new book budget. Working on ordering books while doing curbside duty at my library. But also very glad it is Friday and have the weekend to look forward to.

Tamra Thank you for curbside delivery! 😊 3y
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BookNAround
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This #JanuaryARC will be released on 1/26. (It was supposed to be released much earlier and that‘s why I have a copy already.)

This is also the end of my ARCs until I get home but since bookstores and libraries are at least somewhat open now, I think I‘m going to discontinue posting daily unless people really want this as a way to find new books.

TheBookHippie Oh I want to read this! 4y
Cinfhen This sounds fascinating 4y
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