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What to Do When I'm Gone
What to Do When I'm Gone: A Mother's Wisdom to Her Daughter | Suzy Hopkins
16 posts | 17 read | 38 to read
A mother's advice to her daughter--a guide to daily living, both practical and sublime--with full-color illustrations throughout. One sleepless night while she was in her early twenties, illustrator/writer Hallie Bateman had a painful realization: her mom would die, and after she died she would be gone. The prospect was devastating, and also scary--how would she navigate the world without the person who gave her life? She thought about all the motherly advice she would miss--advice that could help her through the challenges to come, including the ordeal of losing a parent. The next day, Hallie asked her mother, writer Suzy Hopkins, to record step-by-step instructions for her to follow in the event of her mom's death. The list began: "Pour yourself a stiff glass of whiskey and make some fajitas" and continued from there, walking Hallie through the days, months, and years of life after loss, with motherly guidance and support, addressing issues great and small--from choosing a life partner to baking a quiche. The project became a way for mother and daughter to connect with humor, openness, and gratitude. It led to this book. Combining Suzy's wit and heartfelt advice with Hallie's quirky and colorful style, What to Do When I'm Gone is the illustrated instruction manual for getting through life without one's mom. It's also a poignant look at loss, love, and taking things one moment at a time. By turns whimsical, funny, touching, and above all pragmatic, it will leave readers laughing and teary-eyed. And it will spur conversations that enrich family members' understanding of one another.
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Anna40
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Mehso-so

I tend to shy away from thinking about what life without my mother would be like. I don‘t want to think about this separation because the bond is so strong but it‘s inevitable. I love the idea of writing a book focusing on a mother‘s death and her advice, it‘s light-hearted, at times funny, good illustrations but that‘s the problem, it is too sweet, trying too hard to make you feel better when in reality after this loss nothing will.

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booklover3258
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Pickpick

My review of this book can be found on my Youtube Vlog at:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2m87NW1LSlQ

Enjoy!

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NeedsMoreBooks
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Pickpick

Read this after reading the summary on @Come-read-with-me ‘s post. This short book provides advice to the author after her mother dies. The mother is alive but her advice to her daughter is practical, sensible, tragic, and beautiful. The illustrations are gorgeous and the advice extends from overcoming grief, cooking, choosing a partner, to taking care of the self, buying a cane when old and everything in between. #diary/journal #NFNov

Clwojick Sounds lovely. 6 pt 4y
33 likes2 stack adds2 comments
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Come-read-with-me
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Pickpick

Written as a daily diary, “When I‘m Gone” is a collection of wisdom and insights from a mother to her daughter about what to do after she dies. It starts with how the initial shock will feel and guides the daughter through the days, weeks, months, and years without her mother. Some is the advice is hilarious (Why you should make fajitas after a death) and some painfully sad (how your first holiday will feel.) #TIL Grief is a fluid process 😭

NeedsMoreBooks Adding this to my TBR NFNov prompt for diary/journal. Thank you! 4y
Come-read-with-me @NeedsMoreBooks I did the same thing. It‘s such a lovely book 💖 (edited) 4y
57 likes5 stack adds2 comments
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Krisjericho
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Pickpick

Touching and tender. Honestly, I almost knocked off a star because of the mom's insistence that anyone who doesn't get an epidural during childbirth is an idiot, but the rest of the book is so great, I let it go. Kind of. I might still be a little annoyed by it. Maybe. Perfect for those of us who are either getting to the stage of life where we might lose our parents, or those who are just starting adulthood on their own.

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Krisjericho
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Yes.

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megnews
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Pickpick

Mother Suzy Hopkins writes her daughter a touching day by day guide on how to get through life after she dies. Daughter Hallie Bateman illustrates her mother‘s instructions in this #graphicnovel. With instructions on planning her funeral, marriage, work, recipes for comfort food, and everything in between, we could all use a grief manual like this.
5⭐️
Book 20/90 1/18/19

22 likes1 stack add
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megnews
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Megan_Roberts
Pickpick

Love, love, love this. Makes you think about what is important in life and how to take care of YOU. I love this mama‘s advice of self care, finding simple things to be passionate about, and a stiff drink every now and then!

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KarenUK
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Pickpick

Illustrator Hallie, when coming to the realization that one day Suzy, her Mum would be gone, asks her to write a step-by-step guide on how to get along once she dies. And here it is, accompanied by Hallie‘s drawings. It‘s such a sweet, moving and heart-warming project.
I found this a tough read and had lots of tears. My mum has advanced early-onset Alzheimer‘s so I have already lost my mum in many ways. She‘s still here but I miss her already.💕

Suet624 💕💕 6y
Cinfhen 😢😢😢 6y
youneverarrived ❤️ 6y
See All 6 Comments
minkyb ❣️❣️❣️ 6y
Tex2Flo Much love. Hugs. This is a trying time. I‘m with you. 6y
ValerieAndBooks Hugs to you and your mom 💖. I am sure this was a tough read. 6y
58 likes4 stack adds6 comments
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valeriegeary
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"Why go on if we all just die in the end? There's a great reason. If you knew you were going to live forever, imagine how much time you'd waste. Amazing things can happen when there's a deadline looming."

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valeriegeary
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Day 1.....

Make fajitas.

Reviewsbylola Omg what a sad yet uplifting book! 6y
valeriegeary @Reviewsbylola definitely bittersweet ❤️💔 6y
44 likes2 stack adds2 comments
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valeriegeary
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Pickpick

This is a book I wish had been around 16 years ago when I lost my mother. But finding it now is better late than never. With tenderness, illustrations, and a touch of humor, a mother gives her daughter mostly practical advice on what to do in the days following her death. A book for anyone who has lost someone dear to them, who knows the sting of deep grief. This one will lift your mood--or it did mine anyway.

CouronneDhiver Do you think there‘s such a thing as “too soon” for this book? 6y
valeriegeary @CouronneDhiver It would probably depend on the person. The day after a death.... Yes, probably too soon. But a few weeks, probably okay. I imagine it will resonate differently with someone whose grief wounds are fresher than mine but I still think I would have loved it early on. I probably would have just cried a lot more. So, have tissue ready. 6y
60 likes5 stack adds2 comments
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CKtheLibrarian
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Pickpick

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ This book turns a sad moment into sweet and funny guidance from a mother. What a bittersweet read.

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AprilMae
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Pickpick

From day one to day 20,000 this book maps out what a mom wants her daughter to do when she's gone. You'll cry, laugh, love and cry some more as you read it. I recommend this to anyone who has lost someone close to them (mother, father, sister ect.) I connected with so many things in here. 🌟🌟🌟🌟

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FountainBookstore
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Pickpick

This is the book I wish I had had when my mother died. It's a beautiful meditation on grief, love & perspective, in graphic novel format. It might make a weird/cool Mother's Day present if your mom's still with us. The assignment for Day 1: Make a Fajita. It starts with instructions for slicing a bunch of onions and crying. It ends with "Great job! Now don't you feel better? Of course you don't. Pour yourself a stiff glass of whiskey."

Crazeedi This looks like a book I will get for my girls, thanks for sharing 6y
54 likes16 stack adds1 comment