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They Called Us Exceptional
They Called Us Exceptional: And Other Lies That Raised Us | Prachi Gupta
3 posts | 3 read | 7 to read
An Indian American daughter reveals how the dangerous model minority myth fractured her family in this searingly honest memoir that manages to be at once a scalding indictment and a heartfelt love letter (Scott Stossel, author of My Age of Anxiety). In examining with boundless love the secrets and sorrows of one family, Gupta shows us the life-altering power of telling ones truth.Megha Majumdar, author of A Burning How do we understand ourselves when the story about who we are supposed to be is stronger than our sense of self? What do we stand to gainand loseby taking control of our narrative? These questions propel Prachi Guptas heartfelt memoir and can feel particularly fraught for immigrants and their children who live under immense pressure to belong in America. Prachi Guptas family embodied the American Dream: a doctor father and a nurturing mother who raised two high-achieving children with one foot in the Indian American community, the other in Pennsylvanias white suburbia. But their belonging was predicated on a powerful myth: that Asian Americans have perfected the alchemy of middle-class life, raising tight-knit, ambitious families that are immune to hardship. Molding oneself to fit this perfect image often comes at a steep but hidden cost. In They Called Us Exceptional, Gupta articulates the dissonance, shame, and isolation of being upheld as an American success story while privately navigating traumas invisible to the outside world. Gupta addresses her mother throughout the book, weaving a deeply vulnerable personal narrative with history, postcolonial theory, and research on mental health, to show how she slowly made sense of her reality and freed herself emotionally and physically from the pervasive, reductive myth that had once defined her. But, tragically, the act that liberated Gupta was also the act that distanced her from those she loved most. By charting her familys slow unraveling and her determination to break the cycle, Gupta shows how traditional notions of success keep us disconnected from ourselves and one anotherand passionately argues why we must orient ourselves toward compassion over belonging.
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mhillis
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They Called Us Exceptional is a #memoir by journalist Prachi Gupta. She shares her experience growing up in an Indian American family & it is also about other things: the model minority myth, patriarchy, mental health, relationships. Some parts were difficult to read.

For #Nonfiction2024 this is my pick for Not Your Perfect Mexican American daughter as the two books seem to share some common points. @Riveted_Reader_Melissa

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Evita
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5 out of 5!

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Megabooks
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Yeesh this was a difficult one to read. Prepare to be sad. Prachi‘s father is a narcissist to the extreme and used emotional manipulation to control her, her brother, and her mom. That combined with the pressure to be a model minority student and employee deeply affected her and her brother‘s lives. She also looks at toxic masculinity‘s effects on her Indian family. Low pick because I hate the device of writing a memoir as a letter to someone.

Cinfhen Hmmm, I‘m really over the narcissistic parent troupe but I was intrigued by the blurb! I think I‘ll #BorrowNotBuy 8mo
Chelsea.Poole I love this cover! Thanks for the tag. I‘m going to keep this on my radar, but not sure I‘m ready for a difficult read right now. 8mo
Megabooks @Cinfhen I‘d agree with that! 👍🏻 8mo
Megabooks @Chelsea.Poole it is a fantastic cover! I found it difficult. Her dad was a truly difficult, abusive parent, and sometimes those books just exhaust me emotionally. 8mo
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