I no longer know what love is. A week ago I had a lot of ideas. What love is and how to make it stay. Now that I'm in love, I haven't a clue. Now that I'm in love, I'm completely stupid on the subject.

What is forbidden for me, the other woman is allowed. I am offended by this contradiction.

I'm an outlaw, not a hero. I never intended to rescue you. We're our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves.

Mostly I have felt myself becoming a servant of sadness. I am still looking for the beauty in that.

I close my eyes and scale the mountain within me. I look for myself. I can't find me. In each corner of my being, all I can find is his image. I let out a sigh, and all I can utter is his name. I sink into the very depths of me and what do I find? only him. my love for him is pure and perfect, can he not see that?