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Assume Nothing
Assume Nothing: A Memoir of Intimate Violence | Tanya Selvaratnam
3 posts | 3 read | 3 to read
A true story, Tanya Selvaratnam uses her abuse at the hands of former NY State Attorney General Eric Schneiderman to expose the prevalence of intimate partner violence—offering steps to recognize, expose, and end it. When Tanya Selvaratnam met Eric Schneiderman, they fell quickly and effortlessly in love—fueling each other’s growing political ambition. But their power dynamic soon took a dark turn, as Schneiderman criticized Selvaratnam and began to try to control her, even telling her that he would have to kill her if they broke up. Sex turned frighteningly violent. At a friend's urging, she opened up to a domestic violence expert, who confirmed what Selvaratnam, on some level, already knew: she was in an abusive relationship. Eric’s behavior mapped a pattern: entrap, isolate, demean, control, abuse. Selvaratnam considered avenues for protection—an ethics complaint, a civil claim, going to the police. But her abuser was the top law enforcement officer in the state. She feared he would be tipped off, and that he would crush her. Selvaratnam’s story is harrowing, but not as rare as you might think. According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, on average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. A combination of memoir, reporting, and research, Assume Nothing is an urgent, timely examination of a frightening subgroup of abuse of power. It tells Selvaratnam’s incredible story, while offering tools and solutions for a problem that persists, dangerously, behind the closed bedroom doors of people we know and love.
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review
Cinfhen
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Mehso-so

I picked this up for #NFchallenge23 #GoodbyeEarl - a feminist anthem empowering women in abusive relationships. This memoir by Tanya Selvaratnam, a well educated and outspoken advocate was secretly in an abusive relationship with New York State Attorney General Eric Schneiderman, a man who was known for championing women‘s and minorities rights. I appreciated Tanya‘s honesty and bravery in sharing her story but this memoir was flat & restrained.

blurb
she.hearts.horror
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📚

review
Amie
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Pickpick

An interesting memoir about intimate partner violence, especially because the perpetrator doesn't fit the profile that I typically associate with domestic violence. Before reading it, I wasn't aware of the story or who Eric Schneiderman is; probably didn't pay attention to the news stories because it happened in another state or it got lost in a sea of too many similar stories at the time of prominent powerful men being revealed as abusers.

EvieBee Ooh. Noted. Thank you! 2y
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