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No Ordinary Deaths
No Ordinary Deaths: A People's History of Mortality | Molly Conisbee
2 posts | 1 read
History is dominated by A-list deaths: queens beheaded; archdukes assassinated. But what about everyone else? How did ordinary people depart this life and grieve for loved ones - and which of the old ways might help us prepare for the end? Our ancestors, living closer to death than we do, had a more intimate and integrated relationship with death as a familiar presence in daily life. From the death-watchers of the Middle Ages to the pomp of Victorian funeral wear, by way of plague pits, grave-robberies and wakes, historian and bereavement counsellor Molly Conisbee explores how cycles of dying, death and disposal have shaped - and been shaped by - society. She examines, through the prism of past deaths, their interweaving with our beliefs and politics, our most fervent hopes and deepest fears and, ultimately, what it means to 'die well'. A groundbreaking new work of social history, No Ordinary Deaths paints a rich picture of the lives of our forebears, skilfully bringing the lost art of death to life today.
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shanaqui
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I continue to feel weird about this because it kept saying things like “most people never see someone die“, and sure, I get that, but it's not my experience -- and I feel very raw about it, because I was so recently with my grandmother when she died, and it was something I was very, very deliberate about; I wasn't there by accident.

Which is not to say it wasn't a good book, but I think it was a bad time for me to read it.

shanaqui I did appreciate the chapter about queer and other marginalised communities and death (though it didn't have a lot of evidence so it was a fairly short chapter), and other examples picked out to discuss specifics. 2mo
14 likes1 comment
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shanaqui

This one's hitting a bit weirdly because it talks about things like modern people being largely disconnected from death, and... I know it's true of many people, but not of me. In March I was present for the entirety of the last ~10 hours of my grandmother's life, and remained with her body for 5 hours afterwards. I also saw my grandfather's body just after his death, back in 2012. That drawing back from death isn't something I share.

shanaqui Anyway with that being so recent, I'm not actually sure this book is a great choice for me right now, because it's rubbing me wrong in its assumed audience, and also because it's just a raw topic. We'll see. 2mo
willaful I get that, I hate reading about how people are when it doesn't include me. 2mo
11 likes2 comments