I spent way too much on this hard to find, out of print book, on recommendation from a Jonathan Carroll character. IRL, Terry Andrews was the pseudonym of children‘s book author George Seldon & seems like it could be somewhat autobiographic, but I don‘t know anything about him. It is very dark & sexual, written in the form of a journal, telling a story of a single man, Terry Andrews, children‘s author, and his wish for death, love, murder & sex.